The Anatomy Of Perception


First, perception feels real. It is not. 10 people perceiving exactly the same event or thing will have a distinct way of looking at it and feeling about it, that is unique to them. Even if 2 of them are best friends.

Perception is the constellation of your thoughts and feelings working together, and it is the FEELINGS part that is the fuel for the perception.

Even your perception of the very same thing can vary throughout the day, or from one day to the next.

This could be due to how happy you are in the moment, maybe life is going super well for you that particular day or tranche of time, or you are very healthy in your body from months of excellent nutrition and exercise.

So the event, in and of itself, is merely the OBJECT of your perception in any given moment, PROJECTED ONTO the event. In some way, the event does not exist outside of you.

Broadly, the way we look at something can be categorised as being somewhere on the continuum of threat .. healthy challenge to overcome .. opportunity to gain something. 

For example, let’s say we pick 3 people of the 100,000+ who run the London Marathon one year.

One of them is obese, and has done no training for the event.

Another is a keen amateur runner whose best time is 3hr 01 and he’s there to beat the 3hr mark. 

The other is a professional long distance runner looking to add to his gold medal collection and financial gains.

Each at the start line, how are they perceiving the same event? Where on the continuum are they?

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Now that we see that perception whilst feeling real, is inherently shiftable and malleable, what can we do with that, if let’s say we are dreading something or afraid of something?

The problem with a lot of therapists and coaches is that they are too “cognitive” meaning they will try and challenge your thinking about a particular thing.

This takes a long time, is painful, and emotions do not follow the same “rationale” as our thinking.

Furthermore, thinking happens so quickly and triggers the flight or fight neurochemistry that by the time you try and take over with logic it’s often too late and the emotional response is too strong for logic to combat.

I often describe negative perception as being like a thorn bush, with the thoughts being the thorns. 

To try and challenge your thinking is like removing the bush one thorn at a time: painstakingly arduous, and you’ll likely cut yourself in the process.

The way I do it is pull the entire bush out at its root, by removing the underlying emotion to the thinking. And then finding any root-cause memories that are giving rise to that particular unhelpful perception.

Once the emotion (and key “cornerstone” memories) are cleared, the thinking changes on its own and the body and mind feel calm and amazing and naturally insightful and solution-oriented. 

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In what area of your life would you like to heal and optimise your perception?

Where would you like to move from threat to opportunity?

Please book a private session here:

Manifestation Technique For Ideal Partner


A few of you have asked me how I do the emotional clearing and unconscious relational template repatterning work so that you can optimally manifest the right partner for you.

Essentially, how do you remove all the unconscious saboteurs and phobias around love and then how do you MANIFEST “man•ifest or woman•ifest?” 😃 😉 the right partner?

Here is a process I would use in a session:

First Step ~ Clear Any Negative Feeling Associated With Relationships

Think about being in love with an amazing partner.

Does any fear come up?

Go to the way the fear feels in the body, then SAY to the feeling

“I’m surrounding this with Light.”

Repeat the phrase to whatever remains of the feeling of fear.

Now think about being in love with an amazing partner again.

Does anything come up now?

Maybe disbelief or a feeling of unworthiness.

Clear the FEELING of this using the above phrase.

Think about being in love with an amazing partner. 

What comes up now?

If there is ANYTHING negative, clear the feeling immediately.

Repeat the above process til you are fully clear when the you think about the partner.

If there is any stubborn negative feeling persisting, it is likely an unconscious program or memory that needs to be excavated and cleared out.

You can ASK the stubborn feeling:

“What’s this really about?” And let the answer come to you.

Then clear the feeling of it as above.

If the stubborn feeling remains, you can try ALLOWING the feeling, and breathing it into the Heart-Centre, hold it there for 2 seconds then release on the outbreath.

Conclusion: when it comes to manifesting the right partner, clear any negative programming first (which alas creates suboptimal perceptions and projections and saboteurs within relationships) first. Til you ARE AT LEAST at neutral if not bouyantly optimistic.

Second Step: Manifest The Ultimate Vision Of The Ideal Relationship

I am going to ask you a question. Let the answer come to you.

When it comes to a relationship, what is the perfect outcome for you?

What answer comes?

SEE the answer (Vision) and notice how it feels. Breathe the feeling into you.

Say to the Vision “I’m surrounding this with Light.” 

How does it feel?

Breathe the feeling into you again.

This makes your Vision conscious AND embodied, so that you can begin to carry the vibration of that Vision in your body.

When you look at that Vision, does any fear or any other not good feeling arise?

If so clear it immediately using the phrase in the first section. 

Run the question again.

“When it comes to a relationship, what is the perfect outcome?” Let the answer come.

OR, you can use an alternative question:

“What is the IDEAL relationship?”

Then use the subsequent steps as outlined above.

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In conclusion, to manifest, negate the negative, then posit (and embody/integrate) the positive. 

If you’d love to work with me on this to REALLY ensure you get it right, please complete the following:

Law Of Attraction In Relationships


Just because you want something badly – doesn’t mean you will get it. In fact “wanting something badly” or desperately suggests the unconscious PAIN of not having. And that very energy will push away that which you most want.

This all tends to stem from the pain of past loss that has not yet been healed, which then naturally engenders the fear of GETTING what you want in case you lose it.

This is the “shadow aspect” in you.

This shadow aspect will also likely SABOTAGE the very thing you value highly, in the case a partner DOES come into your life.

And so, UNTIL AND UNLESS YOU RECOGNISE this part in you it will continue to EITHER:

(a) Attract partners that won’t be able to commit fully or find a reason to leave — reflecting perfectly your current unconscious belief about relationships.

(b) Push away a partner who IS ready based on your fear/insecurity-based actions and behaviours: sabotage.

Therefore you will be sent the partner who is at your level of understanding and “enlightenment”.

So, how to navigate this? What can you do now to heal all this and manifest the right partner?

A. Notice if you have any fears, neuroses or phobias around relationships —- and clear all of them (you can ask me for the clearing technique). Then once you’ve done that ..

B. Ask yourself the question “What is the PERFECT relationship?” and let the answer come. That is your Vision of the ideal, of what is possible.

Then run a “manifestation” technique to embody and integrate that Vision in you so that HAVING this relationship feels normal.

Hope this helps. Remember, fear and love are both attractors. Make sure you chose the right one.

If you’d like further assistance with this, please let me know:

Intimate Relationships WILL Trigger You: Good!


I was once in a relationship that was beautifully amazing for about 8 months – this extended honeymoon period of feeling amazing to be around each other. We would lay on the sofa in her flat and plan on which restaurants or bar we were going to that evening but instead just stay in, marinading in the beautiful energy that was there between us, and not end up going out!

Then at about month 9 the wheels came off and all the shadow side of her arose – she became highly critical and scrutinising and judgmental of my every move and we spent about 3 months just arguing and then temporarily solving, and salving, the argument.

Then the end of the relationship was strange – by the virtue of her having to move out of her appartment but not having anywhere planned to move into in time – she had to stay with me. Even though we had broken up. It was a very trying few weeks.

She moved out and I was free. Phew.

Then the week after she left, I really missed her. Ideas bubbled up of coming back together so on the Friday I called her, under the pretense of “wanting to know how she is”. After about 20 mins of totally pointless conversation, the real reason arose as to why I called.

“Have you missed me at all?”

“Um, I’ve been so busy moving into my new place and with work that I haven’t had much time to think about it”

“OK, this sounds crazy, but would you ever consider going back out with me?”

“No way. Ha, do you not remember how bad the last few months have been?”

“Oh yeah, fair enough”.

I hung up the phone, retreated to my sofa and had nowhere to go but “fall on my own sword”.

I cried hard, lamenting yet another relationship loss and tried to find any unconscious program in me that was causing this string of amazing then failed relationships. I lamented also the idea that I may never be successful in a relationship. Cue more tears. Actually, more like the wailing you’d see in a Mexican soap opera!

I cleared all the programs in me that were somehow disallowing successful relationships (ask me for the technique) and after a few hours of clearing and crying, I felt peace. Ahhh, felt amazing. I felt completely clear, and happy.

All my NEED for her disappeared, and when I thought of her I JUST felt love. Nothing else. No fear, no need, pure Love. I internally wished her well, and moved on.

After about a week of feeling this way toward her, she called me — wanting to see me again.

1st rule of manifestation — clear ALL the negative emotions, feelings, stories, ideas (negative NEGATES that which you want,) and just feel the LOVE (positive positions).

Relationships ARE Triggering

Relationships BY THEIR NATURE are triggering — they are a strong mirror for ALL your “stuff” to come up — anything that is unhealed in you will rise up — any feelings of inadequacy, not being enough, fears, anger, judgment and the like.

Most people will automatically PROJECT that — causing arguments and discontent in the relationship — thinking that those unhealed programs are “just how it is” as you have always had them.

They are not “just how it is” — they are sacred opportunities to let those programs arise to then clear / transmute them.

When you turn the relationship on its head in this way, and KNOW that they are triggering and ALLOW the programs to rise and then clear them (and not project them) therein lies the GOLD. The Gold of your Higher Self can begin to shine through.

Before long you will be SO peaceful, SO loving (without needing anything) that you will be highly attractive to be around. OR you will make the choice to move on from your partner as you will see them as being too evolutionarily slow.

A partner at your level will then come in. Or a partner that will provoke other patterns that haven’t yet been healed in you. They won’t do it deliberately – it’s just natural and how it works.

10 years on from this relationship, and having treated 100s of people with their relationship flaws and phobias, I have distilled all my teaching and techniques into one course called S.A.F.E. In Love.

S – Security comes from within NOT from your partner

A – Alchemy of any negative program in you; clearing any and all negative relational patterning that is in you

F – Find the Light in the other and activate that, to maximise the opportunities in the relationship

E – Execute on your Highest Vision of a relationship with your partner or future partner

If you’d like to talk to me about the S.A.F.E. In Love course OR you simply wish to heal any negative relationship “program” in you, please complete the following, or message me +44 77239 25056:

Emotional Intelligence Is An Oxymoron


Oxymoron n. A figure of speech that has a contradiction at its core.

To be emotional is to be human, yet you cannot say that you are highly intelligent and brilliantly insightful in those moments of high emotionality.

Emotions are the crashing waves, in fact, that obfuscate intelligence and insight.

When you are in the throes of anger in an argument with someone, and you really want to find that defining idea (one that will fully resolve the issue once and for all) – and indeed articulate it with your finest flourish of wordsmithery – it is unlikely you will be able to in the flames of that roaring passion.

In fact, how many times has EXACTLY the right thing to say popped into your head a couple of hours later? Yes that’s right, when you are calmer!

The most intelligent thing you can do then is CLEAR* (transmute) your emotions as they arise. If not, you are simply stuck in the endless loops of drama — you are simply stuck in the internal story-lines that each emotion generates: be it sadness, anger, fear and on and on. Each have their own internal narrative that keeps the thought-emotion loop going.

Transmute To Transcend

Beyond the emotion is NOT some kind of dullness or mutedness. Actually it is the most alive, most luminescent, most ILLUMINED insight and superior level of intelligence. One that can surmise the entire truth of a situation and see exactly how to navigate it. It comes with it swathes of natural bouyancy and aliveness. It is YOU but your Higher Self.

It’s a very healthy place to be.

So do yourself a favour, do not be a slave to your emotions. Transmute them, to transcend them.

*One of Dan’s clearing techniques can be found here: https://dansainsbury-transformation.com/a-new-way-to-look-at-emotional-triggers

A New Way To Look At Emotional Triggers


  • You’re stuck in traffic late for an important meeting. Everyone is hooting and there seem to be REALLY dithery drivers when the traffic finally starts to move.
  • Your partner seems to disrespect you at a social event and even seems to be flirting with an attractive guest.
  • Your boss overlooks you for some quality work you did and a seemingly lesser competent colleague is praised for something really basic.

There are countless times we are triggered every day, and the emotional reactions can be anything from shame to fear to jealousy — and the intensity anything along the continuum from mild to highly intense.

Traditional ways to deal with this range from VENTING (which can cause relational, interpersonal or career damage), to SUPPRESSION (which can cause a build up then an eruption later down the line – even to health issues) to DISTRACTION (which can include medication, alcohol, over exercising etc) to DEFERMENT (taking it out on someone else later in the day who really didn’t deserve it).

I believe that each time we are emotionally triggered is a unique opportunity to CLEAR the trigger in the self — and the ultimate result of this is, when this is completed IN FULL you can remain a paragon of peace and equanimity and perspicacity EVEN IN THE MIDST of traditionally triggering events.

When we remain authentically and naturally peaceful and unmoved, THEN we have access to our most formidable inner resources: intelligence, insight, instinctual best decision-making, seeing the greater truth in the situation — and we are able to navigate each and every situation optimally.

Technique to clear triggers.

When you feel the emotion arising due to the trigger, do the following:

  1. Drop out of the head and bring your awareness down into the body where the emotion is.
  2. ALLOW the feeling and BREATHE IT into the Heart-Centre (the centre point of your chest).
  3. Hold it there for 2 seconds, and breathe it out.
  4. Repeat 1-3 with what remains of the emotion.

This is called TRANSMUTATION and will clear the emotion. Keep doing this each and every time you are triggered and before long there will be this peaceful, calm intelligence that will be present. It’s glorious!

The key is to deal ONLY with the feeling and NOT the flurry of thoughts that come on the back of the emotion. Don’t get distracted by emotion-fuelled thoughts!

Try this for the next few days and let me know how you get on.

How To Address “Over-Emotionality”


I was working with someone this morning who had been very emotional in her life.

The smallest thing, even someone being kind to her – even her being kind to herself – would make her cry.

Added to which she felt an overabundance of fear and anxiety toward life, toward the list of things she had to do on a given day.

She wanted to address this surplus of emotions with me, this “over-emotionality”.

We’d cleared a lot of the emotions in previous sessions but the anxiety still fired … and THIS tends to point to a single (or multiple) traumatic event in her life.

Sure enough, when she was 20 she lost two friends in a car accident. And in that moment she “decided” that life wasn’t safe. She had unconsciously written the rule that life is not safe and that even the smallest things have a risk.

I ran my clearing technique to TRANSMUTE the memory, all the “toxicity” from it until she felt clear.

She also mentioned that for many years after, she didn’t feel right, that her world was tilted on its axis .. so we ran the clearing technique on the 7 year (or so) timeline post-event.

She then felt distance from it. Like it no longer had an effect on her.

These unconscious programs, ideas, dictates and memories all transmuted, that frees her up to view life and her future with more peace and expansion. With a better ability to make choices that align with her interests and highest values, and not from a crumpled position.

I’m excited by her follow up sessions to ensure we can optimise her future still further.

Dan.

Your Beliefs Are Screwing You


Your beliefs are underwritten by your fears.

Your beliefs are largely “dictatorial whispers” in that they are largely working away behind the scenes, outside of your consciousness.

They are the silent screams that say “you can’t do that” “you don’t deserve this” “you’re not good enough for this”.

Or “money is inherently bad”, “men only want me for …”, “women only love me when I’m…”

They are cultural imprints, either from wider society or from the more immediate culture of your family.

They are NOT your voice, but an external clamour, internalised.

Please become more conversant with these tacit tremors.

Take time to CAPTURE what your beliefs are, as they underpin the expansion and enjoyment of your life, or lack therein.

Note: as long as they fly behind the radar without your conscious control, the more you will just think they are fact.

They are not, they are fear-ction.

EXERCISE

Find a quiet 5-10 minutes where you can reveal your tacit, hidden beliefs.

To take them from unconscious and non-verbalised, to well-defined and fully articulated.

Because at that point we can shift them.

Deep breath into the body and answer the following:

What’s your belief about money?

A:

What’s your belief about relationships?

A:

What’s your belief about (you chose an area you know you struggle with)?

A:

If you want a handle on ILLUMINATING limiting beliefs, and then most importantly CLEARING them, follow the link below.

I will run a process that EXPOSES those beliefs in the different areas of your life, then we will move toward what you DO want instead.

That will then act like a kind of holographic projector to open you to more majestic planes of living 👉

https://dansainsbury-transformation.com/sessions

We Have Emotions All Wrong


“I’m so worried about this upcoming event”. 3 days later, “How did the event go?” “Oh fine actually”.

“I feel so guilty about not spending time with him” “Have you asked him if he minds?” “No.”

“I’m so angry at the way she spoke to me today” “How’s that working for you?”.

“I woke up super anxious about all the things I have to do” “Is your anxiety helping?” “No, of course not”.

To be so dictated to and governed by emotions is clearly a waste of time. Yet most humans think they ARE their emotions.

They are blown this way and that by them like a sapling in a gale.

Are you not absolutely done with that nonsense?

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We are never told as children, or indeed as adults, that we are not our emotions. And that clearly they are wildly inaccurate most of the time.

Yet they have such a stronghold on us and force us to do things (shout at a loved one sometimes doing irreparable damage to a relationship) and NOT do things (ask that beautiful person out; start your passion-project; leave an abusive partner) way too frequently. 

Therapists and coaches often don’t help either. Far too concerned with the cognitive level, the thought level, trying to challenge your thinking and battling emotions with logic.

It largely DOES NOT HELP.

I was fortunate enough to be exposed to the idea that it is our FEELING (emotional) layer that is the FUEL for our thinking. 

The emotional layer is fundamental to the type of thinking you engage in, funda-mental, literally “underneath the mental” . It’s foundational to it, so when you address THAT level, that’s when the natural shifts and uplifts to your perception and perspective occur.

So, for example, let’s say you have an anxiety at an emotional intensity of an 8 / 10, your thoughts will reflect that.

If you found a way to bring that to a 4, your thoughts would soften and become automatically more optimistic about the thing you are anxious about. 

At a 0 there would be total relief, and an automatically empowered and optimistic mindset.

See, thoughts and feelings work in tandem.

There are 2 techniques I use to bring the emotions to a zero.

If you’d like to try them out, best to speak to Dan directly:

WhatsApp: +44 77239 25056

Email : dansainsbury.transformation@gmail.com

FEELING S.A.F.E. IN LOVE


Everyone dreams of the perfect relationship. One that is forever joyous, emboldening and empowering. One that involves a deeply scintillating journey through life together. One that gives the deepest sense of passion, meaning and purpose.

Yet very, very few have this. Why is that?

Romantic and intimate Love are difficult because love by its nature flushes up all the neuroses and unhealed programs that are buried deep in the psyche. It flushes up all that is not Itself.

Precisely for this reason, it can feel easier to be single, because you don’t have to “hit up against” all the matter that is generally dormant and unactivated in a life that doesn’t have the mirror of intimacy.

Romantic Love is such a piercing search-light that it can feel like you’re being turned inside out, all the previous unseen material of the unconscious suddenly flushed to the surface to be seen in all its grizzly detail.

Alas, the uninitiated RUN at this point. Or REACT egregiously, to their partner:

  • Needing confirmation 
  • Testing them
  • Displaying infantile behaviour 
  • Breaking down
  • Blaming 
  • Any other fear-based and ultimately sabotaging behaviour. 

In fact, when this psychic matter is flushed up it is precisely in this moment that there is a “sacred fork in the road”.

Do you go down the route of the ego (the fragile sense of self that has a constant need to survive and exploit) which is a route ultimately of very limited growth, usually decay, death and destruction ….. or the route of total healing?

Taking the sacred route means to meet unhealed matter as it arises and MELT it. This will allow you to break through and become your most incredible, loving, fearless self. 

To then have the most joyous, empowered relationship. 

It will be my pleasure to show you exactly how to do this.

~

Love can often feel PRECARIOUS, unsafe. Yet there are things you can do to feel TOTALLY safe in Love.

In my program “S.A.F.E. IN LOVE” I will walk you through exactly how to do it, encapsulating the following 4 Principles:

S – Security. Security that comes from within and that is there as a constant.

A – Alchemy. How to transmute and heal all the matter within that makes you feel scared, insecure, neurotic in a relationship. Moving from scared to sacred.

F – Find the Power, Joy and Light in your partner, so that it reflects back at you, and incrementally heals them

E – Execute on the ultimate vision you have with your partner to enjoy the best of life together. 

~

This is a deep dive into advanced romantic psychology, will involve a deep healing of your fear-based and ego-based programs and patterns, and will set you up to have an exceptional relationship. 

If you’d like to hear more, simply dm me.

I can only fit a total of 20 onto the program and it is first come first served.

Please fill out the follows and Dan will get in contact with you: